Obi-Wan Kenobi
by Cringey Claire
Summary: Just Obi-Wan doing his do. Worrying about his ramen supplies and being annoyed by stuck-up Windu. Sassy!Obi-Wan Sarcastic!Obi-Wan (Some inaccuracies just for the sake of certain encounters and such)


Kenobi Life

Obi-Wan awoke at 5:30 to begin his morning regimen. He practiced the Sun Salutation precisely 8 times, then meditated for 30 minutes. While meditating, he happened to fall asleep, so he awoke an hour later at 7:15. He hurriedly ate his breakfast, then climbed onto his speeder to rush to work.

On his way to work, an obnoxious policeman tried to give Obi-Wan a ticket.

"Sir, did you realize just how fast you were flying?"

 _Do you realize I'm a Jedi? GOSH!_ Kenobi thought to himself.

" **I was driving at a perfectly reasonable speed. I don't deserve a ticket. There are more dangerous criminals out there to be found. Also, you need coffee.** " Prompted Obi-Wan.

"You were driving at a perfectly reasonable speed. You don't deserve a ticket. There are more dangerous criminals out there to be found. Besides, I need coffee." Echoed the policeman.

"Well, if that's all, I'll just be on my way." Said the Jedi.

Slightly disoriented, the policeman said, "Yeah..."

Obi-Wan looked at his watch. _7:48! I'm going to be late!_

He rushed off again and arrived at the Jedi temple at 8:05. Fashionably late.

The Jedi leaders looked up from their conversations as he entered the room.

"Nice of you to join us, Master Kenobi," Commented Mace Windu, a large black man who wielded a purple lightsaber. "Why do you happen to be late?"

"Well, you see, I had a vision this morning in my meditations, and allowed it to concern my entire being. It involved Sith lords returning, the chosen one being one of them, and large steaming pots of oatmeal. Naturally, of course, this took longer than expected, and I was made to be late. I am very sorry if I have caused you any concern."

"Sith lords, you say…" croaked Yoda. "Troubling business, indeed, this could be. For informing us, thank you."

"No problem, Master Yoda. I was only doing my duty."

Mace Windu glared, unconvinced, at Obi-Wan, and Kenobi felt a smirk tug at his lips. Thankfully, in the low lighting of the room, it wasn't visible.

When the Jedi dispersed, Anakin was waiting in the hallway for Obi-Wan.

"Master! Come and see! I made a breakthrough with my levitation skills!" he said excitedly.

"Yes..." Kenobi said, trying to appear mildly interested, even though his mind was on other, more important issues, involving Wookie rebellions and a lack of instant ramen in his cabinet.

Kenobi followed Anakin into the levitation room, and found there multiple small children suspended by their undergarments, all hanging in the air. Anakin burst out laughing while Kenobi suppressed a smile.

"Anakin! You mustn't do this! Do you realize the implications of your actions?!"Kenobi scolded. _And the paperwork involved? It's going to be another talk with_ Windu. He groaned to himself. "Let those children down **gently** , then apologize to each of them. I'll have to clear this up with the other masters before it reaches them through other mouths."

Anakin pouted, "Don't be such a Debbie Downer. I waste all of my good jokes on you." Then he let the kids down and, cringing, apologized. The other children forgave him, bless their little Jedi-bred hearts, although Obi-Wan could see that they hated it. He sent Anakin to go meditate upon his actions, then went to see Windu.

Obi-Wan spent as long as possible loitering in the hallway and making small talk with some other Jedi before approaching Windu. Windu was such a stuck-up guy. He couldn't take any form of joke, and he never believed Kenobi when he lied. Honestly. You'd think he was devoid of emotion, but Obi-Wan knew he wasn't. Kenobi had seen Windu laugh heartily at Even Piell's jokes during break times.

When Obi-Wan knocked on the door to Windu's office, it slid open, and Windu looked up.

"What seems to be the matter?" Asked Windu, but Obi-Wan could tell that the implied meaning was 'what are _you_ doing here?'

"Just some apprentice issues, I'm afraid," said Obi-Wan suavely. "Anakin dangled some young apprentices by their robes this morning as a practical joke. I made him apologize, and wished to inform you before you heard it from the children themselves. As soon as I can, I'll have him doing some sort of punishment."

Windu looked surprised at this statement, then thanked Obi-Wan for telling him and ushered him from the room. Just at the door, Windu called out, "Maybe you should join me for some coffee some time, and we can talk apprentices. I think that would be fun."

"Sure." Replied Obi-Wan, confused, but pleased. Later he considered this conversation and remembered- _Mace is a suck-up! This coffee thing is going to be awful!_ And he groaned inwardly.

Then, he remembered Anakin, and rushed to the boy's meditation station.


End file.
